Betrayal

You better keep the doors close,
Cause, no one really is greeting you with open arms,
A gun was hidden in their back pocket,
Every word you uttered will be used against you,
Don't believe a word they say, they are there to break you,
No one cares, no one cares enough,
They look at you skeptically,
From the way you walk and the way you talk,
Nothing can be accepted with open arms,
Should I change?
Should I just shut up?
You might be laughing behind my back about a girl that...
What shall you say?
Shall you bring up things I keep hidden in my darkest mind,
things I dismissed and try to ignore despite me seeing it in the mirror every day,
Or shall you talk about things that I have never given thought,
things that would make me try to change again,
I am tired of thinking,
that 'maybe this person is okay, they won't judge...',
then be proven wrong,
I fall in love too quickly and often been slapped into reality,
I can't afford any risk anymore,
Why do I never learn?
Keeping my back turned, away from everyone is the safest choice.

-Izzati MT-

"But I guess I got to be grown up. Got to be okay with not being okay. Which completely sucks."

Nick, Before We Go (2014)